Weddings and babies.

I've entered the age, and I suppose have been in it for a while now, where just about everyone I know is either getting married or having babies. Last weekend I went to the lovely bridal shower for my cousin's fiancée, Katie. Nate and Katie are getting married in a few weekends from now. I really couldn't be happier for them, as I think they are a great match. She's a lover of the outdoors, which is important for a man whose favorite season is winter (and he actually likes to be outside in the winter, not wrapped in a few layers of wool under a down comforter in front of a roaring fire, like me), she's athletic, and she's caring and kind. All things that one would want in one's spouse. I wish Nate and Katie nothing but the best, and I greatly look forward to their wedding, which is on the Cape, where I haven't been in years and years. Here's a photo of the bride-to-be at her shower:

Katie didn't break any ribbons when opening her gifts, which I guess means she's not having any kids. Right! My cousin Nate and his brothers and sister are made for having children because they'd all be great parents. And those who have children so far are great parents, and have wonderful children. It's unfortunate that I don't get to see those kids as much as I would like. But soon there will be a new addition, making Nate an uncle again. I mentioned this before, but my cousin Amy and her husband Mike are expecting a baby in March. Apparently around March 21, which means that there's a chance it could be born very near - or even on - my birthday. March is a good month to be born. Both my mother and I have March birthdays. We're a strong bunch, we March babies. It's a windy and generally chilly month, so we build up tolerance at a young age to adversity. Anyway, we saw Amy at the shower for the first time since she announced her pregnancy, and this allowed everyone the chance to give her all the advice on pregnancy, births, babies, childhood that she should possibly want, but in person. I'm sure she was overwhelmed by it all. My sister, though, having had three children not too long ago, certainly wanted to impart some of her learned wisdom to her cousin. I snapped a photo of the moment of sharing:

For me and Doug, though, our wedding is over and so I guess we're looking at babies now, but neither of us can bring ourself to say without hesitation that we want a child. I mean, how can one really know that a) one wants one, and b) one is ready for one? I can't wrap my head around the fact that a baby is not just a baby. Because certainly I like babies as much as the next girl, but for me my concern is the part about the baby growing up. Turning into an adolescent, a teen, and then an adult. There's so much that could go wrong with raising a child. I can barely handle my cats - how can I handle a human life? Definitely I'm not quite ready yet to tell Doug without reservation that I'm ready for kids, and he's fine with that. Allows him to focus more of his time on his goals and his hobbies. We like goals and hobbies a bit too much at this point to add a child into the mix, but we certainly salute and are excited for those who are ready for it (and look forward to babysitting, playing with the babies, and then giving them back to the parents when done).

Speaking of those who are ready for it, we are hosting a party/shower for our friends Chris and Chris in just three weekends. I'm really excited about it - Doug and I love having people over to the house (the more the merrier), and at this party we'll be bringing together people we haven't seen in a long time. And people we've never even met, like our friends Mike and Emily's baby boy. Doug and I do have to sit down and create a menu for this party (thankfully I won't be cooking the desserts, so they'll actually be presentable, but I am wondering if I should give up on cooking the food, too, and just leave it in the hands of prepared foods from the grocery store, or maybe take-out. We do have a wonderfully large - and I'm talking big and fancy - Whole Foods right near us now. Doug and I went there the night after it opened this past Thursday and had a blast looking at all the products that aren't in the smaller stores. Plus, the place was so neat (literally)! Each aisle was wide and long and all the goods were faced so neatly. Check out the juices behind Doug in this photo:Talk about everything being in its right place - this was a dream come true for me.), but we also have to decide if we are going to lock the kitties away in one of the rooms so that they don't bother the guests. Hard to believe that something so cute and fuzzy could be a nuisance, but some people don't like cats, or are allergic. Then again, the guests of honor have two cats of their own and adore cats (and also like our cats and don't get to see them often), so we're on the fence on this one.

But we don't have to make a decision just yet. In this particular moment, all we really have to do is finish packing up our stuff, get in the car, and make the trek up to my uncle's house in New Hampshire for the long weekend. A little kayaking, a little loon sighting, perhaps even a climb up Mt. Cardigan... this is what needs to occupy our minds right now. Relaxing awaits!

Warning: I'm complaining again.

You know, I do think I give myself a hard time. I am very hard on myself. Most days I think that I am pretty much the scum of the earth, that everyone else whom I pass on the street is worth more than me. How I determine this worth, in what currency, I don't know, but I tend to think that all I say and I all do is worth nothing. And I feel badly for being who I am. And I go to therapy to try to change myself, because I am just an inferior person, full of discontent, negativity, naivety, confusion, inexperience, blah blah blah. But I will say this. I am tired of all that. I am actually a good person with plenty to say and give that is meaningful and valuable, and my complaints, though they may seem like many, are legitimate. I actually don't have that many complaints; I just tend to harp on the same ones over and over again. And I feel guilty about complaining, because I feel like I shouldn't complain, that complaining is for losers, that life is great and I should feel lucky to be alive... again, blah blah blah. But again, I will say this. There are some things that I should complain about. Some of my complaints are legitimate, and I am tired of feeling badly about getting annoyed by certain things.

Here's thing number #1 that I am tired of feeling badly about getting annoyed by (and yes, I know that sentence was filled will all kinds of bad grammar, but tonight I'm not going to care about my grammar. I will use poor grammar without guilt or shame). Thing #1: Things not being in their right place. Now I am not saying that I am the neatest person in the world. I create piles of junk just as well if not better than the next person, but what I do like is to know where things are and have everything be in that spot when I go to look for it. For example: We have a jar on the island in the kitchen. It holds elastic bands, twisty-ties, thumb tacks, pens, and a pair of old scissors. I like the scissors to be there, there in the jar, because often I have a need for a conveniently placed pair of scissors. However, frequently I go to get the conveniently-placed scissors and they are not there. Where are they? Beats me. They are missing. And then I have to spend an inconvenient twenty minutes or more trying to locate the so-called conveniently-placed scissors. Another example: my camera and my USB cord for the camera. My camera lives in my pocket book. If it is out of the pocket book and lying around the house it is because I have made an unforgivable oversight in not putting it right back into my bag, which I faithfully do 98% of the time. In that shameful 2% of the time, though, I know where in the house the camera can be found. However, not when the camera is taken away. Moved. Without me knowing where to, when, why, or how. And even when I find the camera, if the USB cord, which is ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS in the computer, is not there, then what good does the camera really do me? Because what is the camera for, after all? Taking photos for the blog. And if there is no camera cord, then there is no blog. If the USB cord goes to work, just like all the Tupperware containers, CDs, Blackberry chargers, and other such items, it will never, not ever come home. Please, why can't the camera's USB cord just stay in the computer?

These complaints are legitimate. If something is moved, put it back. Life is so much easier to handle that way. Really. Trust me on this one.

Now that I'm done revealing my innermost thoughts on this blog, probably revealing way to much of me and making a fool out of myself in the process, I will go try to find something to eat. I hope the cereal is where I left it last Sunday...